Intimate Affairs: DNA: SHOULD SOME SECRETS BE KEPT FOREVER?

By Funke Egbemode

This DNA problem is steadily becoming a problematic epidemic, isn’t it? It is querying the integrity of our men’s manhood and stripping our women of their belt of chastity.

Intimate Affairs: FOOD FOR THE GODS

By Funke Egbemode

Kudi, fine-girl-no-pimples, was one of those undergraduates who lived their lives on their own terms on campus. Kay-girl, as she was fondly called, was an ‘aristo’ girl.

Intimate Affairs: HE MARRIED THE MONEY

By Funke Egbemode

Tunji – T.J for short- had always seen a bright future for himself in Nigeria. Not even SAPA could make him JAPA. He knew where he wanted to go and had a map even Google would be proud of, of how he’d get to his destination. So, while all his friends and peers were testing the waters of cybercrime and considering yahoo-plus and its gory gruesome details, T.J had his eyes peeled for how he’d move from his ‘near Lagos’ Boys Quarters’ apartment to Ikoyi, Lagos. Yes, you heard that right; from extreme poverty to the five-star neighbourhood. How? He was going to find himself a rich man with a single-and searching daughter. Lucky T.J, he got both in one fell swoop. He found both a rich man and his single-and searching daughter.

Intimate Affairs: HURTING AND LONELY HEARTS

By Funke Egbemode

Efe and Dayo dated for three years and we all thought they were headed for the altar. The introduction ceremony had already taken place and we were already picking out colours of the day, at least in our heads. Then out of the blue, things fell apart. Dayo dumped her in the meanest way. He took her money, her pride and her love and jetted out to Canada with another woman. After three years of romance andscented candles. Efe tried to be strong, putting a fake smile on, like everything was going on well. We all thought she was strong and doing fine until tragedy came calling. She wrapped her Toyota Camry round an electric pole and almost died.

Intimate Affairs: INTIMATE WARNINGS FOR 2024

By Funke Egbemode

You are 33 and not doing badly. You are comfortable and beautiful but your love of easy money has blurred your childhood vision of a cozy happy home with children and a husband that loves you to bits. Your once vivid dream of falling in love and marrying early to raise four children while nurturing a career has since given way to the steady ready flow of cash and ‘baby of life’ lifestyle. You are now a chartered side chick, living on the side street of some other women’s lives. The man you love is not your own.

Intimate Affairs: MARRIED NOT FOR LOVE

By Funke Egbemode

It is not every marriage that is founded on love, not every married person who married for love. Don’t tell me you don’t know a few people who took their vows based on what they could see rather than what they felt. They stood, all dressed up in front of their Pastor, Bishop or Reverend Father and repeated the right lines rightly after the clergy, in front of men, not because they were ecstatically, deliriously in love but because they had chosen who they chose at that particular point in time for a set of particular reasons.

Intimate Affairs: MATURE, SINGLE AND LONELY

By Funke Egbemode

A woman who wants sex, effective sex that delivers on all the errands it was sent, has no business marrying a man with low sex drive. A woman who wants sex 20 times a month should not be in a relationship with a man who thinks women who want sex more than once a week are nymphomaniacs.

Intimate Affairs: MEN JUST LOVE FORBIDDEN FRUITS

By Funke Egbemode

Before King Ahmed Ottoman went to war, he locked his beautiful wife, Queen Ottoman, in a private room and gave the key to his best friend, Mousa, telling him: if I’m not back in four days, open the room and she’s yours. Ottoman got on his horse and went to war. Half an hour later, the king noticed a cloud of dust behind him. It was his friend, galloping fast towards him. “What’s wrong?” The king asked panting. Out of breath, Mousa responded: “You gave me the wrong key.”

Intimate Affairs: MY MUMMY IS GETTING MARRIED

By Funke Egbemode

Lola is 59 and getting married again. She has been single for 27 years and had, with the grace and help of God, raised four children all by herself. She made the announcement at New Year dinner with her children in Canada and all four of them dropped their cutleries. Their eyebrows simultaneously shot up. That was followed by what felt like an hour-long silence. Then, somehow, they all found their voices at the same time.

Intimate Affairs: THE FOOLHARDY HE-GOAT

By Funke Egbemode

A man with the he-goat spirit is a man who does not listen to your advice. It’s not that he does not respect you. It’s just that he respects that thing in-between his legs more. He is not deaf either, he just likes the sonorous voice of his third leg. It is sweet in his ears. And anyway, the vibes he gets from doing things with his partner-in-crime, his third leg, leaves him feeling like a king and conqueror. A very good feeling, I gather.

Intimate Affairs: THE HUSBAND SNATCHER

By Funke Egbemode

‘Whose idea was this whole ‘husband snatcher’ theory? Who started it? I asked my friend. He’s a man, street-wise one too.

Intimate Affairs: THE OTHER ABUSIVE MEN

By Funke Egbemode

When we hear wife or spousal abuse, our minds prop up the image of a woman with eyes swollen shut, broken nose or arm in a sling. However, not all abuse is physical; there is also mental, emotional and financial abuse and the victims suffer as much as the ones whose husbands pound and pummel.

Intimate Affairs: THE PETROL ATTENDANT AND HIS NOZZLE

By Funke Egbemode

This piece was inspired by a story told by the old man of an honourable member while I served briefly at the National Assembly. His choices of words were really what got me thinking. I must confess I was eavesdropping but, trust me, I got the intimate lessons in the intimate gist.

Intimate Affairs: UNWISE SACRIFICES

By Funke Egbemode

Patty was in pain, deep searing pain. She was not supposed to be in this place, end up at this sorry pass. She gave Alhaji her all, the relationship her everything. Relationship? Was what they had even worth calling a relationship because looking back from her balcony of grief, all she could see now was a one-winged flight that eventually crashed spectacularly. The pain wracking her body and soul was made worse by the feeling of foolishness. You know how you feel when you finally realised you’ve been used, had, taken advantage of and you allowed it all happen, with your eyes wide open.

Intimate Affairs: WHAT EXACTLY DO MEN WANT FROM US?

By Funke Egbemode

Why do men think big successful girls are single because all they want is money and independence instead of marriage and commitment? Why do they think being financially independent mean you want to live alone and die lonely? Well, the women also suspect that there is a hidden agenda somewhere. Yeah, can the men swear that they are not the ones annulling our rights and mandates while promising to ‘Insha’ Allah ‘empower’ us. You can’t win against their armoury. It is so difficult to please or understand the way their minds work. But haven’t I warned that there is no point trying to decipher a man’s mind?

Intimate Affairs: WHAT WOMEN WANT

By Funke Egbemode

So there have been protests from certain quarters since last week’s piece titled ‘WHAT EXACTLY DO MEN WANT FROM US?’. How dare you make it look like men are difficult, insatiable, irritable and mean? How about what men want from women or at least those things you women really want instead of being sarcastic? I chuckled at that because men have been pretending that they don’t understand women since Adam willingly took the apple from Eve and voraciously devoured it. They will continue to pretend confused even if you give them one apple per minute. It’s their way and women have made their peace with all that. But me, I’m a good girl, even if I said so myself. That is why I am obediently throwing more light on what women want from their men.

Intimate Affairs: WHEN 'SORRY' MEANS NOTHING

By Funke Egbemode

We called them the ‘happening couple’. Flex (real name was Felix) was a 500 level Medicine student while Tunrayo was a 200 level Law student. Though the two of them were very busy ‘effico’, they spent every free moment together. They went to the bukateria together, walked hand-in-hand to the library and the cinema. They were a reference point especially when we girls wanted to ‘yab’ our NFA male classmates who were in the habit of giving excuses to their girlfriends as to why they couldn’t take them to see a movie at Oduduwa.

Intimate Affairs: WHEN A GOOD WIFE LEAVES WITH HER GOODNESS

By Funke Egbemode

When Debola and Akin got married, Akin was not in a good place financially. He was living from hand to mouth, struggling to pay his rent and generally depending on salary advance to get through the month. He was getting on in years and his parents were permanently on his case to get married. He was reluctant to commit to any serious relationship. How was he expected to feed two mouths when he couldn’t feed himself? How can you tell a new bride not to get pregnant because his tiny room-and-parlour could and would not expand because the occupant was now married? Akin dug in his feet, avoided his parents as long as he could because of the marriage thing.

Investigation Report: WHY PEOPLE FORGET EASILY!

By Celestine Okafor (Editor-in-Chief) @CeleOkaf11

For all ages, people often are affected by severe or partial loss of memory, which experts in clinical psychology and other category of behavioral scientists, have described as Amnesia.

ITREALMS MEDIA UNVEILS 2026 NIGERIA DigitalSENSE FORUM

* Focuses On Sustaining WSIS Vision And Multi-stakeholder Synergy

By Our Reporter

As the global community accelerates toward a more integrated digital future, ITREALMS Media Group, through its flagship digital rights initiative, the Nigeria DigitalSENSE Forum (NDSF), has officially announced the 2026 edition of its annual convening on Internet Governance for Development (IG4D). The forum, scheduled for Thursday, June 11, 2026, at the Welcome Centre Hotels, Ikeja, Lagos, will bring together policymakers, tech innovators, and civil society under the theme: “Sustaining WSIS Vision with Multistakeholder Synergy in Nigeria.”